By Michael Traynor
Here is the Groundhog’s press release on Groundhog Day 2025!
Greetings my friends! February 2nd is here — the midpoint day of winter — Groundhog Day — time for my annual prediction on the beginning of Spring. If today the sun shines brightly, I become scared of my shadow, escaping back to my burrow for the predicted 6 more weeks of winter. Should only clouds appear, I fearlessly stay outside for the predicted immediate onset of spring. That’s just how I roll. Today, I predict springtime is here! To express your gratitude for my efforts, donations may be made to my Patreon account.
Ever wonder why I do this? Well, for millions of years now, Mother Nature has asked me to help the most evolved species in her kingdom to survive, especially when that species is most vulnerable. Currently, that means you! Since it’s not nice to fool Mother Nature, my spring forecast helps you decide when best to plant spring crops, and when to forage for scarce food during the brutal tail-end of winter — when life hangs by a thread. We groundhogs are fierce advocates for nurturing all life on earth.
Mother Nature now asks you to follow our example and be a good steward for life on earth. To the best of your ability, please help your fellow species particularly those less evolved, to survive and prosper. Humans should pay the gift of life forward. Mother Nature wants your leadership, and we little groundhogs will do our best to help you.
Groundhogs have offered advice to every evolved species Mother Nature has chosen to help shepherd her kingdom. Not every species has heeded my advice. The dinosaurs refused to look up at the sky and take cover. The crocodiles declined to learn how to walk upright. When a chosen evolved species falter or leave the scene, Mother Nature replaces them with the next most evolved candidate, and I advise them. This is how Mother Nature rolls.
Here is your Groundhog Day advice: I encourage you to treat one another with greater compassion. You are all one common species and family, so please treat yourselves with greater empathy and kindness! A house divided cannot stand. Say no to gratuitous bickering over petty, imagined, and fabricated grievances. Say no to whatever and whoever seeks to divide you, whether by accusations, slander, deception, gratuitous cruelty, or violence. No species can afford to behave in these ways, while at the same time brandishing sufficient weaponry, aimed at each other, to instantly create a planet-wide mass extinction event. By cultivating more compassion, species, Mother Nature is less apt to replace you. Both the cockroaches and the artificially intelligent machines stand ready to take your place.
Spring begins today and I am cheering you on. Seek out every opportunity to perform random acts of kindness. Let the warmth of your relationships with others BE the springtime that brightens each day. Then by the light of your compassion, it will always be springtime. With all of you starting this day, what a HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY it will be!
Best regards, and see you all next year, – The Groundhog
